Lessons from more than a Doctor

To many of his patients, Dr. Eric Kwek Soon Kiat was more than a doctor; he was a doctor whom had gone the extra miles – a doctor whom they could have a heart to heart talk on many issues other than their medical conditions and a doctor whom wasn’t rushing his patients out of his consultation room so that he could see more patients and fatten his wallet. Dr. Kwek was a good doctor but most importantly … he was also like a friend to many of his patients. Fond memories of his acts of kindness, his patience and sincerity will always touch the hearts of his many patients or should I say, friends.

I have the habit of sharing lessons, as what a dear friend of mine put it, with family and friends through email. I am not sure if they read the email all the time because I rarely get a reply from them. It has always thrilled and delighted me to get replies once in a while. However, I was both happy and sad when I received a reply from this dear friend about a week ago. He was the one who shared the story of Dr. Kwek with me.

Although I did not know Dr. Kwek personally, reading the testimonials of his patients still saddened me. In a tribute to him, I learned how he had walked the extra miles. He was called up late one evening by this patient’s sister and yet he turned up at the hospital’s A & E department just to visit this patient. They made a detour to his clinic later, at close to midnight, so that he could give this patients some jabs. A simple act like this could have been just a routine and norm for Dr. Kwek. However, for this patient, this simple act of kindness and concern meant a great deal and touched his life.

In my reply to this dear friend, I said, “It is very rare these days to find a good doctor who is not more interested in his/her pocket than his/her patient.” I hope Dr. Kwek story could serve as an inspiration to other doctors and aspiring doctors. Just as the revenue is important to you, your patients are equally, if not more important as they have entrusted their lives to you. In saying that, I do not deny that survival for you and your family is also important in order for you to have a peace of mind to help others.

From the video on Kindness by Amy Krouse Rosenthal which I had share in my last post, Amy asked, “What constitutes a life worthy of being remembered? How do you want to be remembered? Big questions to reflect upon! A life worthy of being remembered will differ from individual to individual as one explores deep within oneself. And how do one wants to be remembered? That could be a tricky question as how others remember us may not always be how we have wanted them to remember us.

Perhaps the question we need to consider is “What is/are the important things, the priorities, in our life 10, 20 or 30 years down the road?” It seemed that what was important to Dr. Kwek had naturally become the way of how people are remembering him now. The story of Dr. Eric Kwek Soon Kiat has enlightened me and reminded me of the priorities in life.

To leave you with something my dear friend said, “Life has different plans for each of us, may all of us finish it without regrets.

Do you have a story of a doctor who has also touched your life? Perhaps you would like to share it with us? Maybe you can walk an extra mile and send the doctor a ‘Thank you’ note.
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Photo by Parentingupstream

Wordless Wednesday: Kindness

My entry for this week Wordless Wednesday is a meaningful short video titled ‘Kindness,’ which is a collaboration between writer Amy Krouse Rosenthal and the Toronto-based design firm Thought Bubble. Before playing the video, you may like to pause it to let it finishes loading up first.

More Wordless Wednesday

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80 … and still going strong

Photo of Madam Kong Sin Sim by Jason HoI read a refreshing piece of news today, ‘80 … and still going strong,’ about an 80 years old lady (picture). You may ask, “What can be so refreshing about the news of an old lady?” You may not agree with me, but this news not only provides a positive and inspiring read, it is also much more uplifting than all the political and economic news in the printed paper.

When a lot of men and women around her age have already resigned to fate and to some of the myths of aging, Madam Kong Sin Sim continues with her almost daily workout routine of stretches, light weight training and swimming at the gym. According to her 47 years old son, she is a bundle of energy and constantly encouraging them to exercise!

Not only that, “….her doctor has declared her to be healthy and free from conditions such as high-blood pressure and diabetes…” She credited all that to more than 20 years of regular exercise and eating right.

One common myth of aging is the increase of dependency on others as we become physically incapacitated. This is certainly not true. According to the University of Pittsburgh, Institute of Aging, “Helplessness and dependency are not characteristic of old age. About 87 percent of adults over 65 are able to cope more than adequately with the demands of everyday living.

Ninety is the new 70, according to a report in usnews.com. The Baltimore Longitudinal Study of Aging (BLSA), a 50 years ongoing study involving 3,000 seniors, found a reduction in heart attacks among older men who took up a high-intensity activity like swimming or running. Not only that, older exercisers also experience less shortness of breath and fatigue.

From the above reports, doesn’t it make sense for us to start exercising today? However, if you are a senior and wants to start an exercise routine, it is very important to first consult your doctor to see if you are fit for exercising, or if any precautions need to be taken.

I believe that most of us will have this question in our mind: What would be the age when one would be considered too old to take on new challenges or to learn new tricks? Yes, this is a trick question and the answer is pretty straight forward; one is never too old to take on new challenges or to learn new tricks.

With this new perspective in mind, let me share with you the story of Cliff Young, which I believe our Australian friends would be very familiar with. He was the potato farmer who inspired the whole nation. At the age of 61, he participated in the first Westfield Sydney to Melbourne Ultra Marathon (875 kilometers, 544 miles) in 1983, competed against world-class athletes and won the race in record breaking time; trimming almost two days off the record for any previous run between Sydney and Melbourne. Cliff Young continued to run more than 20,000 kilometres during his competitive career. Cliff was like anyone of us; a humble, average man, who undertook an extraordinary feat and became a national sensation.

Whoever is still saying he/she is too old to do something or to learn new trick, he/she may want to adopt this new perspective: we are never too old to take on new challenges or to learn new tricks. I will have to remind myself constantly too.

Photo by Jason Ho from todayonline.com
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Spring Cleaning Inside Out

I read a post ‘Spring Cleaning for the Soul’ at The Guy’s Perspective recently which touched on spring cleaning inside out. I left a comment saying that I like the idea of spring cleaning … just that sometimes I am taking too long to start; in fact, much too long. Some of the stack of old bill stubs, receipts and invoices which I found today dated as far back as 2003 or maybe even earlier. I didn’t bother to really look because they were all paid in due.

It didn’t really take much effort to clear the stack of old bills stubs, receipts and invoices that were sitting in the cabinet. And yet how did they get stacked up and taking all the spaces in the cabinet which could be put to better usage? Procrastination. As the saying goes, ‘out of sight, out of mind.‘ It is about time to take the first step. The Guy’s Perspective post provided that kick in the butt.

Today, I decided that it is time to let go of all that stack of old bill stubs, receipts and invoices. Their rightful place are in the recycle bin. They are of no use to me or anyone as long as they remained the way they are. However, going through the recycle bins, they have a chance to be recycled into something useful again.

Do you have stack of old bill stubs, receipts and invoices sitting in the cabinet waiting to be cleared? Perhaps it is time for you to clear the messes; spring is really a good time to start.

Besides the old stack of bill stubs, receipts and invoices, are there also emotional baggage which some of us are carrying through life like? Some of these emotional baggage may not really do much harm to us but they do take up spaces and give us the messy feeling; like there is always something holding us back. Wouldn’t it make sense for us to clear them too?

I have cleared the mess outside today and there are more to be cleared in the other cabinets. After that, it will be time to revisit the messes inside to start cleaning them too. It is time to ditch the emotional baggage,.

When will be a good time to start spring cleaning inside out? There will never be a better time; all we need to do is to start somewhere. Once we start, we would pick up the momentum from there. Decide today to let go of our emotional baggage to move on with life. We will inevitably find the journey less messy, much lighter and much more enjoyable.

Photo by sciucaness
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Wordless Wednesday: Life and Death


More Wordless Wednesday

I took this picture of a blooming flower from a plant I have outside my home about two months ago. My mother is the one who is keeping it and I have no idea the name of the plant. For almost 4 years I have never seen any flowers blooming from it. However, about two months ago, it surprised me with this beautiful flower. I just have to take a shot of it with my Sony Cyber-shot camera phone. Yes, this camera phone can produce some decent shots.

There may be question in your head, “Why ‘Life and Death’ in the title?” When I was taking shots of the flower, I noticed a green bud next to it; promising yet another beautiful bloom – another life. One life was moving towards the end and the other was just coming into life. Is it ‘Life beginning at the ending of another’ or is it ‘Life ending at the beginning of another?’

Like ‘Chicken or Egg?’ Frankly, does it really matter whichever come first. Most importantly was that the flower bloomed beautifully for when it was time for it to bloom. Such is the work of nature, to keep the cycle going. The plant does not question what nature has for it. Until the next bloom, the cycle continues everywhere around us, everyday, every hour, every minute and every second.

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A Beginner’s Mind

How was your weekend? I hope you had a wonderful weekend with love, peace and inspiration. For me, I had a nostalgic weekend; I took a ride on a Double-Decker bus. For some of you, a Double-Decker bus ride may be the norm for you everyday; commuting from places to places. Did you enjoy your ride? Or the ride today was just like any other day?

Back in 1995 – July 1997, taking the Double-Decker bus ride was the norm for me almost everyday. I would need to ride for almost an hour from my home to my camp and then another hour ride from my camp to home. I did that for almost everyday. However, I was always looking forward to the bus ride and to seeing the special someone every morning.

That is not the point. My nostalgic weekend has nothing to do with the girl I saw during the bus ride but the bus ride itself. When I was even younger, I was a loner. I did not like to mix with people and I did not have many friends too. I love taking bus. Almost every other weekend, I would go on hours of bus ride. It was always exciting to go on a bus ride.

Sometimes it was a ride to the airport where I would stay for awhile at the departure hall to looked at the planes taking off or landing. Sometimes I would take a bus ride to the beach where I would cycle to a quiet location and sat there for an hour or two. Almost everywhere I went, I took the bus.

Slowly I became sort of an ‘expert’ in bus taking but gradually a bus ride also became just a bus ride to get me from point A to point B.

In the book ‘Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind,’ by Shunryu Suzuki it states:

In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert’s there are few.

In the book, it suggests that the beginner’s mind is an empty mind which is always ready for anything; it is open to everything. On the other hand, the expert’s mind is one which thought that it had attained something and thus limited.

Thus the book suggests that we always keep our beginner’s mind. I did not really understand the full meaning of it until I boarded a Double-Decker bus on my way to meet up my friends. It was just another bus ride but when I got on the upper deck of the bus and sat down, I was brought back to my younger days of bus taking. Suddenly the bus ride became exciting and a ‘new’ experience. I was immersing in the view from the window.

For a while the possibilities seemed unlimited; new roads, buildings and places were discovered during the ride. The beginner’s mind at work. Same old bus ride but approached with a beginner’s mind brought new perspectives, experiences and excitements.

When we went through something repetitively, eventually it would lose the ‘freshness’ factor. Has it? Or in the process, we have acquired the attitude that ‘I knew it all already.’ It is easier to have a beginner’s mind with new things or people. The challenge is keeping it going; always having a beginner’s mind.

Photo from Wikipedia
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Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind

Life Goes On

In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: It goes on.” – Robert Lee Frost

This morning, I read a write-up Top 5 Best Quotes Ever by thooghun in Hub Pages. What is Top 5 Best Quotes to one may not be the Top 5 for another; It is subjective as mentioned by the author.

However, the author mentioned something which brought me to a new level of appreciating quotes. I have always like collecting quotes for the wisdom we can find in them, from my own interpretation, my own understanding, my own experiences and my point of views. It may or may not have anything to do with the great and famous people who uttered those words.

The author mentioned, “We cannot fully understand the beauty and power of certain quotes unless we understand both the context and the experiences of those who uttered them.” How true isn’t it?

Most who have undergone personal tribulations and challenges in life may understand that the world does not stop just because of them. The people around them would offer love, consolation, support and sympathy but end of the day, these people would have to move on with their own lives. The planet still continues to revolve around the sun. Nothing stops; changes are taking place all around us in the next nanosecond. This realisation usually comes later for some; for a while they may stop moving in their lives and thought likewise that their lives have ‘stopped.’

If only all will realise one day as what Robert Lee Frost had experienced that ‘Life goes on,’ then moving on and letting go would be much easier, smoother and faster.

A look at Robert Lee Frost’s personal life, one would realise that his life was plagued with grief and loss. At the age of 11, his father died of tuberculosis, leaving the family in financial distress. From Wikipedia:

Frost’s mother died of cancer in 1900. In 1920, Frost had to commit his younger sister, Jeanie, to a mental hospital, where she died nine years later. Mental illness apparently ran in Frost’s family, as both he and his mother suffered from depression, and his daughter Irma was committed to a mental hospital in 1947. Frost’s wife, Elinor, also experienced bouts of depression.

Elinor and Robert Frost had six children: son Elliot (1896–1904, died of cholera), daughter Lesley Frost Ballantine (1899–1983), son Carol (1902–1940, committed suicide), daughter Irma (1903–1967), daughter Marjorie (1905–1934, died as a result of puerperal fever after childbirth), and daughter Elinor Bettina (died three days after birth in 1907). Only Lesley and Irma outlived their father. Frost’s wife, who had heart problems throughout her life, developed breast cancer in 1937, and died of heart failure in 1938.

For Robert Lee Frost, ‘life’ then truly went on. I am deeply moved by the strength and inspiration in his words. I hope that you too will be inspired and you will find the inner strength; life goes on!

Photo by winterdove
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